Can A Long Distance Relationship Work?
I’ve been playing about with the idea of writing this post on and off for months. However, it’s been my reality for the past nine months so here we are. As some of you may know Ross and I have been in a long distance relationship for a while now, so I thought I’d share some honest thoughts on how it’s been and things that I’ve learnt during that time.
Long distance relationships get a really bad rep. and yes, it is definitely hard. And no, three hours doesn’t seem like that much of a distance but I can tell you it’s not easy. Ross and I have been together for four years and in March I got the opportunity to leave my retail job and work in a design studio. The only problem: it was based in Glasgow. Seeing how miserable I was at my job, Ross encouraged me to go for it. We’d find a way to make it work. Nine months on and I’m glad to say we have.
It has come with some pros and cons though. Obviously, I know how much Ross means to me but there is nothing quite like being apart from them to remind you of how much they mean to you. 'Absence makes the heart grow fonder' and all that. Alongside the time apart, I’ve really enjoyed the time we do spend together. Weekends filled with lie ins, laughs and Judge Judy — there is nothing better. In general, I feel like it has made our relationship a whole lot stronger. We’ve learnt how to talk about things better, not take each other for granted or be lazy with one another. I wouldn’t change the past nine months for anything.
While it has taught me a lot, it has also come with some challenges. Sunday’s are the worst. Honestly, I’ve never felt Sunday blues like it. The homesickness is horrible. I never knew that you could become homesick from a person. Feeling distant is hard. When you are both having a rubbish week and you just feel so far away from the other. It’s normally something you both are feeling, my advice would be to talk about it and work out ways of bringing you back together.
One of the most important tips I could give to someone would be: Communication is so important! Like, I can’t stress that enough. I know communication is a fundamental part of any relationship but being able to talk about how you both are feeling about things really helps. Even learning how to communicate differently now that most of your communication is over text/phone calls is a learning curve. I took for granted how easy it was to just sit and chat nonsense. It is so much different over text. After a long day at work you sometimes can’t be bothered to chat much over text and vice versa. Understanding that has definitely helped make things easier. On the flip side, remembering to take the time and make the effort to phone or text the other person, even when you’ve had a bad day, is so important!
Overall our experience of being long distance has been positive. It has definitely brought us closer together and strengthened the relationship in more ways than I ever thought was possible.
However, I’m really excited to share that Ross is moving down to Glasgow in the New Year. It’s the start of another exciting chapter for us and I’m glad we are starting it on such a positive note. Have you ever been in a long distance relationship? How did you find it?